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Dear Bossip: My Husband’s Ex Doesn’t Know Her Place & He Won’t Say Anything, Now She’s Visiting
Dear Bossip,
My husband and I have been married 3 months, but we’ve been together 3 ½ years.
The thing is his ex-girlfriend lives in Atlanta, but she just keeps showing up at his momma’s house, which is right next door. When we had only been together a year she came here and he spent the night with her while we were living together. So, you can imagine how I feel when I see her. And, she just keeps showing up and staying at his momma’s house next door for weeks at a time.
Now, when I told my husband about it not being right, he says there’s nothing wrong with it because he doesn’t want her. My husband was just recently in the hospital and the family called her and she is coming to see him. I was upset that my husband thinks that it’s okay because he doesn’t want her. Am I crazy to be mad? The past is the past and they have no kids, so why can’t she leave it alone? – My Husband’s Ex
Dear Ms. My Husband’s Ex,
Chile, she shows up if she wants to, and she would get a rude awakening! You keep letting this –ish slide and being okay with it, but at some point you need to stop being so accommodating and flexible. Flex your muscles and fists on top of somebody’s face! (I’m not condoning violence, but, err, uhm)!
Ma’am, the problem is your husband. He is the one who is disrespecting you, and allowing his ex-girlfriend to have access in his life. He continues to give her privileges which she is not entitled. He has not told his family that it’s not okay to bring her up, and allow her to visit knowing he is a married man. He has chosen the woman he wants to be with, and whom he loves, so they should respect his marriage, and respect you. But, until you get him in check, and in order, he will continue to disrespect you, your marriage, and your relationship. He doesn’t see anything wrong with it because you don’t! BOOM! BAM! POW!
So, you can’t be mad at only her. They are both culpable in this. They both are doing some low down dirty –ish, and you need to get them right together. The hell is wrong with his a** allowing his ex-girlfriend to come visit and tells you there is nothing going on between them, and he doesn’t want her. Then why the hell does she keep showing up?
And, she needs to get her a damn man, and learn how to move the hell on. He’s married! She should respect you, your marriage, and stop hanging around like a damn buzzard. But, buzzard birds only do buzzard bird things. So, you can’t expect her to do better, be better, or know better. She’s a rat, and you need to treat her accordingly and begin the extermination process. She’s a gutter low-down dirty trifling a** hussy, (LOL! That’s my grandma’s word), and you’ve got to put your foot down, on her neck, and in her a**!
It’s time for you to get a backbone, stand up, and confront your husband about his ex. You’ve got tell your husband and make sure that he understands that his ex doesn’t need to come visit, call, write, text, email, send smoke signals, Morse Code, or send messages through the family. He is married. You are his wife. He needs to start acting like he is in a committed monogamous relationship. You are no longer going to put up with his antics, and bull-ish a** lines, “I don’t want her. She means nothing to me.” Then why is she visiting, and why is he staying the night with her? Oh no ma’am!
Look, you keep allowing this to go on, and they will continue to treat you as the doormat that you allow them to wipe their feet on. They disrespect you because you let them. Folks can only do to you what you allow them. And, if you keep letting them walk over you and on you, then they will keep walking over you and on you.
Lastly, I wonder if you and your husband have ever spoken or discussed what a marriage entails. Did you and he just get married and you figured he would fall in line with what you thought a marriage entails? Did you have some expectations of how he would be, or, if he would change once he got married? Because this woman has always been around. She was there the entire time you were dating for those 3 ½ years. So, why didn’t you nip that –ish in the bud then? Why didn’t you put your foot down then? Ma’am, you can play stupid, and act naïve all you want, but they were still creeping around and sleeping together, and probably are continuing to do so, because I’ll be damn if she came to visit the first year of you dating and he spent the night with her, and you lived with him. Oh, hell to the naw! And, you let that –ish slide! You didn’t say or do anything? You just figured she was going to go home and move on with her life, and you and he would move on with your lives?
The ex is not going to go anywhere because he doesn’t want her to go anywhere. He has her, and you as his wife, (well, you’re the wifey side chick). LMBAO! So, it’s time to set some boundaries, create some rules, and let him know how things are going to go moving forward. You have to communicate effectively how this bothers you, and makes you feel uncomfortable. Confront him and ask him if they are sleeping together, have slept together, or if he is interested in sleeping with her. Then, you need to find out if he has been communicating with her, what he’s telling her, what she’s saying to him, and why are they communicating! You demand that he ends this relationship with her immediately, let her know it’s over, and to stop acting as if she has girlfriend privileges. He needs to put her in her place, set the record straight, and focus on his marriage. If he can’t make these adjustments, then you let him know you will be making some adjustments of putting him out, collecting alimony, and moving on with your life. – Terrance Dean
Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below!
Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean: loveandrelationships@bossip.com
Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter: @terrancedean
“LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook, click HERE!
Miley Cyrus Named Among “Least Influential Celebrities” By GQ
SMH: Lesbian Waitress Claims Family Wouldn’t Tip Her Because She’s Gay But Family Proves They Did!
Somebody lied…
Gay Waitress Claims Family Wouldn’t Tip Her
After a gay server at a New Jersey restaurant said a customer denied her a tip and wrote her a hateful note on the receipt, a local family contacted NBC 4 New York and said their receipt shows they paid a tip and didn’t write any such note.
Via NBC New York reports:
Dayna Morales, a former Marine and a server at Gallop Asian Bistro in Bridgewater, posted a photo on Facebook earlier this month, showing the bill with a line through the space for a tip. The photo of the receipt showed someone had written, “I’m sorry but I cannot tip because I do not agree with your lifestyle.”
Morales indicated in her Facebook post, and in subsequent media interviews — including with NBC 4 New York — that the customer wrote that line.
But a family contacted NBC 4 New York claiming their receipt from the restaurant shows they did leave a tip, and provided what they said was a credit card statement as proof.
The husband and wife, who asked to remain anonymous, showed NBC 4 New York a receipt that appeared to be printed at the same minute, on the same date, for the same $93.55 total, except with an $18 tip.
They also provided a document they said was a Visa bill, which appears to indicate their card was charged for the meal plus the tip, for a total of $111.55.
The couple told NBC 4 New York that they believed their receipt was used for a hoax. The wife says she is left-handed and could not have made the slash in the tip line, which she said looks to be drawn from the right.
“We’ve never not left a tip when someone gave good service, and we would never leave a note like that,” the wife said.
The husband said he and his wife have both worked in restaurants and believe in the value of tipping, and noted that he didn’t vote for Gov. Chris Christie because the governor doesn’t support gay marriage.
“Never would a message like that come from us,” he said.
Morales told NBC 4 New York on Monday that she was certain she did not receive a tip, and insisted the handwriting on the receipt was not hers. When asked if there had been some sort of misunderstanding, she said, “I don’t know, all I know is what I’ve been saying.”
A manager and the restaurant owner insisted they had the original ticket for the $93.55 charge, but would not produce the receipt for NBC 4 New York and could not explain why the family’s credit card was charged for more.
The restaurant later said in a statement it was aware of the allegations and had no comment pending an internal investigation.
Something smells fishy and it ain’t the lesbian’s fingers!
Matrimony-dom: Kelly Rowland “Very Happy” To Be Engaged To Her MAN-ager
We already broke this last week, but whatevs… Kelly Rowland’s engagement to manager Tim Witherspoon has been confirmed and the singer is reportedly “very happy.”
According to US Weekly reports:
Kelly Rowland is a single lady no more! The “Kisses Down Low” singer, 32, is engaged to marry her manager and boyfriend Tim Witherspoon, sources confirm to Us Weekly.
“She has been showing [the ring] off to friends and family and is very happy,” one insider tells Us. “She wants to…enjoy [it] and celebrate for a bit longer.”
Rumors that Witherspoon had popped the question circulated when Rowland was seen wearing a large diamond ring in a video on a pal’s Instagram account.
This will be the Destiny’s Child singer’s first marriage. She was previously engaged to football player Roy Williams; they split in January 2005, two months before their planned wedding.
“I was too young for marriage,” the British X Factor judge later told Cosmopolitan UK of their breakup. “But sometimes you fall down and you learn from it.”
Congrats again Kelly, like we told you LAST week.
WENN/Getty
Race Matters: Florida Christian School Tells Young Black Girl To Cut ‘Wild Natural Hair’ Or Face Expulsion
Really??
School Tells Black Girl To Cut ‘Wild Natural Hair’ Or Face Expulsion
An African-American teen says she faces expulsion because administrators at her private school want her to cut and shape her hair.
Local Orlando 10 News reports:
Vanessa VanDyke said she was given one week to decide to whether cut her hair or leave Faith Christian Academy in Orlando, a school she’s been going to since the third grade.
But for now, she and her mother do not plan to change her hair because it is part of the 12-year-old’s identity. But her natural hair style comes with a cost.
“It says that I’m unique,” said VanDyke. “First of all, it’s puffy and I like it that way. I know people will tease me about it because it’s not straight. I don’t fit in.”
VanDyke said that first the teasing from other students, but now, school leaders seem to be singling her out for her appearance.
Faith Christian Academy has a dress code and rules against how students can wear their hair. The student handbook reads: “Hair must be a natural color and must not be a distraction,” and goes on to state examples that include, but are not limited to, mohawks, shaved designs and rat tails.
“A distraction to one person is not a distraction to another,” said VanDyke’s mother, Sabrina Kent. “You can have a kid come in with pimples on his face. Are you going to call that a distraction?”
VanDyke said she’s had her large, natural hair all year long, but it only became an issue after the family complained about students teasing her about her hair.
“There have been bullies in the school,” said Kent. “There have been people teasing her about her hair, and it seems to me that they’re blaming her.”
“I’m depressed about leaving my friends and people that I’ve known for a while, but I’d rather have that than the principals and administrators picking on me and saying that I should change my hair,” said VanDyke.
“I’m going to fight for my daughter,” Kent said. “If she wants her hair like that, she will keep her hair like that. There are people out there who may think that natural hair is not appropriate. She is beautiful the way she is.”
School administrators responded to an email asking about the issue, but did not provide any answers to questions.
We hope the school comes to its senses and leaves this child alone. She’s beautiful and so is her hair!
8 Things To Be Learned From Suge Knight’s Doggystyle Interview With Rolling Stone
This past Saturday (November 23) Snoop Dogg’s debut album, Doggystyle turned 20-years old. There were over a baker’s dozen reasons on why it was one of the most influential and riveting entries into Hip-Hop music…. Continue
Ceaser Goes H.A.M. on Crying Dutchess! – Black Ink Crew [Video]
Messy Boots Records: 10 Things We Learned From Love & Hip Hop New York Ep. 5
Another episode of Love & Hip Hop New York is in the books, and someone may have trumped Peter Gunz when it comes to being a douchebag. Yep, Saigon made a play to become the bad guy thanks to his shenanigans with his baby momma…. Continue
You ARE The Father! O.J. Simpson’s Manager Believes The Jailbird Baller Smashed Kris Jenner And Is Khloe’s Real Dad!
Manager Says O.J. Simpson Could Be Khloe Kardashian’s Father
Via RadarOnline
Is Khloe really a Kardashian? Fans have been asking that question for years, but now, a shocking new report has given the rumors their strangest twist yet: O.J. Simpson‘s manager, Norman Pardo, has come forward to claim that the notorious incarcerated former football star is her real father!
The truth, “is going to come out sooner or later,” Pardo tells In Touch. And he believes that the real story is that Simpson and Khloe’s mom, Kris Jenner, conceived the youngest Kardashian sister during a drunken hookup.
Kris, her husband Robert Kardashian, and O.J. and his then-wife Nicole Brown Simpson“all took their vacations together,” Pardo explains. “There was a lot of partying going on back then. Kris cheated on Robert. She was known for having a good time.”
But did that include a hookup with Simpson? Says Pardo, “Whenever I bring it up, he giggles.”
Kris’ own sister, Karen Houghton, confirms to the mag, “Yes, there are rumors that Kris and O.J. had an affair. And there are rumors that O.J. could be Khloe’s father. I know O.J. was trying to contact Kris from jail.”
Let us find out that O.J. was lookin’ for a lil conjugal visit from Madame Kris!
Images via WENN
Do Better: Women Who Need To Leave Their Men
Women Who Should Leave Their Men
We know, we know. It’s difficult to leave someone you’re in love with. But sometimes it just has to be done. These women need to just be strong and leave their men. It’s for their own good.
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Splitsville: Mariah Carey Confirms Whether Or Not She’s Staying With Nick Cannon Just For The Kids
Mariah Carey Confirms Whether Or Not She’s Staying With Nick Cannon
Via RumorFix reports:
Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon seem like one of Hollywood’s couples who are lovely-dovey all the time, but a tabloid claims they are “falling apart.”
Star alleges, “Amid rumors of her cheating and him checking out of the relationship, Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon’s five-year union is in jeopardy.”
Their source says, “Mariah and Nick’s marriage is hanging by a thread. Neither of them shows much interest in working through their problems.”
The tabloid adds that Mariah and Nick barely see each other and basically live in different cities. So why don’t they split up?
The supermarket rag claims they are only staying together or their two children and Mariah don’t want to dump Nick because he’ll get a “huge chunk of her fortune.”We at RumorFix didn’t believe this trash for a second. Nick makes lots of money on his own, so we don’t think he’d stay in a bad marriage for dough. And, just for good measure, we contacted Mariah’s rep who tells us, “Completely false and made up rumor.”
Do you think Mariah and Nick will last another year?
Dirty Feet Matrimony: Amina Says She Didn’t Get A Ring On Her Wedding Day And Knew Peter Gunz Was Cheating
The ring didn’t mean a thing because he didn’t buy her one!
Amina Buddafly Opens Up About Wedding With Peter Gunz
Amina Buddafly might have her married name tattooed on her side, but the singer/reality star didn’t have a traditional wedding or a ring when she up and married Peter Gunz.
Via S2S Magazine reports:
“We woke up, and we wasn’t drunk anymore. It was early in the morning, and we were both clear in our heads. It was a spontaneous thing,” Amina told Power 107.5 radio. “We had been talking about it for a few weeks, for a little while.”
Amina said there was a witness present, but she didn’t even have a ring at the time of the ceremony.Though Amina admits she suspected Peter was dealing with other women during that time, she wasn’t concerned enough about it to investigate Peter’s situation.
“As we moved on, months passed. I was wondering and I asked him, but it was always about him and I,” she said.
Peter’s longtime girlfriend and babymama Tara Wallace has stated that she thinks Amina should have known or made an effort to find out about his other relationships.“I really didn’t bother,” she said. “Maybe I should have.”
Though she felt unrecognized for some time, Amina didn’t publicly claim her title as Peter’s wife until season 4 of “Love & Hip Hop: New York” started taping. That’s when she decided to reveal their secret marriage.
“I just need to make it clear. I’m the wife. It needs to be respected. Everyone’s talking bad about me, calling me all these names. I just had to make it clear, I am above you,” she said.
Even after learning that he was playing house with his babymama while they were married, Amina said she doesn’t regret marrying Peter. Although, if the two hadn’t been so spontaneous that fateful morning, things might be different.
“If we had thought it through, we probably wouldn’t be married right now.”
What type of thirsty bird randomly marries a man with no ring and suspects is creeping on her?? Oh…
For Your Viewing Pleasure: Gabrielle Union Takes It Off AGAIN In ‘Being Mary Jane’ Promo [Video]
Gabrielle’s back with that bangin’ bawdy of hers.
‘Being Mary Jane’ Promo Shows Gabrielle Union Bare All
In this preview for BET’s new series “Being Mary Jane,” Gabrielle Union’s Mary Jane finds herself drowning in all of her own thoughts. Some of them involve Andre (Omari Hardwick), who’s been using her as “the other woman” without her knowledge.
You Can’t Be Serious: Man Leaves His Two Cats $250k Inheritance And Home While His Family Gets NOTHING
A man gave his entire estate to his two cats instead of his family.
Man Leaves His Two Cats $250k Inheritance
Via CBS Local Charlotte reports:
Leon Sheppard Sr. left behind a 4,270-square-foot house and $250,000 for his two cats, Frisco and Jake. His will outlines that the money is to care for his cats and the maintenance of the home.
“If their owner sees fit, they can create a trust for the welfare and benefit of the cats and their care,” attorney Randy Fishman said to WSMV.
Fishman, who has practiced law for almost 35 years, explains that this is a rare case.
“I don’t know [if] I’ve ever come across one,” Fishman said.
According to WSMV, Sheppard’s daughter said the family did not want to talk about it, but neighbors of the man said he loved his cats.
The family could see some money from the estate eventually. When Frisco dies, whatever is left of the estate including the home can be passed to Sheppard’s human heirs, but Jake must be cared for still, according to the will. However, the heirs will be allowed to move Jake out of the home.
The attorney told the tv-station that the will is legal.
Sheppard was president of United Food and Commercial Workers Local 1529 before he retired, WSMV reported.
He died at the age of 79.
That man sure loved him some kitty cat! Or just really hated his family.
The Mary J. Blige Acting Struggle: 10 Reasons She Should Give It Up
So We Know It’s Real: Nicki Minaj’s Manager-Boo Safaree Gets Her Face Tatted On His Arm
Safaree Gets Tattoo Of Nicki Minaj On His Arm
YMCMB first lady Nicki Minaj and her long-time manager/boo-thang Safaree still have yet to officially confirm that they’ve been coupled up for years, but Safaree’s latest gesture of admiration for thicky-Nicki is gonna make it pretty difficult for them to keep up their “friendly” facade.
Writing it off as “getting a tattoo of someone I know,” Safaree recently shared a video of his latest ink job: a huge tattoo off Nicki’s face on his arm.
Scaff Beezy knows he’s fooling no one with this “someone I know” talk. They might as well just come out with it, riiigghht?
Hopefully things turn out better for these two than they have for other entertainment industry fellas who got inked up with the faces of their lady loves only for it to not work out (Ochocincho, Jermaine Dupri, Nas…). Check out more close up pics of Safaree’s ode to Nicki tatt, along with the video footage of the process, on the flip.
Free At Last: Dirty Dog Ashton Kutcher And Demoralized Demi Moore FINALLY Settle Their Divorce!
Ashton Kutcher And Demi Moore Divorce Finalized
According to TMZ reports:
Ashton Kutcher has something to be thankful for this week — his divorce from Demi Moore was just finalized … TMZ has learned.
The docs were filed Tuesday afternoon by disso-queen Laura Wasser on Kutcher’s behalf, ending the marriage that began in 2005. The two had separated in 2011.
The reason it took so long for the saga to finally end (Ashton initially filed for divorce in Dec. 2012) — is because they were squabbling over money.
As we first reported, Demi wanted spousal support even though she’s worth way more than Ashton. Our sources say she backed off that claim.
We’re told … they ultimately reached a financial settlement and Ashton gave Demi somewhat more than he had to, but at least it’s finally over … and now he can focus on getting hitched to Mila Kunis (if he wants).
Oh, he’s DEFINITELY gonna get hitched to Mila ASAP! Wonder does Demi really feel that Ashton’s money bought some of her dignity back?
Image via WENN
Bow Wow And Keshia Chante Talk Kissing Games And “106 & Park” Being Hijacked By A Twerker ! [Video]
BOSSIP exclusives galore in this one! We recently joined Bow Wow and Keshia Chante in a live video chat where we learned that Bow Wow was recently banned from posting scantily clad “bow approved” posts on Instagram and got the scoop on the twerker who crashed their set. Check out the chat below: